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They Have Trust Issues. Could That end up being a Red Flag?


March 18, 2023

Reader Question:

The guy I’m presently dating is somebody I came across through the platonic section on Craigslist five months back. We fundamentally talked everyday through email and text messages. I experienced crush on him, and then he stated he was into hanging out. But the guy never questioned me personally out.
Eventually I confessed I had a crush on him and then he stated he had one, also. He stated the main reason the guy did not wish to spend time is basically because he has got confidence problems. Over monthly later, the guy ultimately agreed to hang out, and we venture out about once weekly. But he wont tell me their last title, get older or birthday.
What perform these questions have to do with confidence? Could that be a red flag?
-Cheryl (Pennsylvania)

Dr. Wendy Walsh’s Solution:

Dear Cheryl,
this is not a red flag scenario. This guy is obtaining under a tarp of yellow parachutes. He is so enigmatic that I also be concerned with your own security!
Let me fully grasp this straight. You came across a stranger on line, you fell into an email/text crush primarily based independently imaginations about this guy, you hounded him to go away with you, he offered you a warning about his mental health, now the guy won’t also inform you his title!!!
Cheryl, I’m sure what it’s prefer to would you like to feel loved. I know just what it’s like to think about a guy is actually fantastic when you haven’t got much information to be on. And that means you tend to be totally forgiven with this girl crush behavior, but, honey, this really is absolutely creepy.
The mummy in myself also believes he wont provide you with their last title caused by just what an online search will unveil – and it could even consist of violent behavior. Hint: those who never trust others often you should not trust on their own either.
Please you should not see this man once more and soon you’ve received their full name, get older, contact information and then have done a criminal background check. Really don’t need to see your image regarding the Nancy Grace Show beside me.

Dr. Wendy Walsh’s response:

No counseling or therapy advice: This site doesn’t offer psychotherapy guidance. The website is supposed only for utilize by customers in search of general info interesting relating to issues folks may face as individuals along with connections and relevant subjects. Material isn’t meant to replace or act as substitute for expert assessment or solution. Contained observations and opinions shouldn’t be misconstrued as particular guidance information.

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